Hike at the Arboretum

Newsy

So many new chapters going on our family right now. Where to begin?

1. I am starting my own business and applied for a license (it came in the mail a few weeks ago). I named it White Rabbit Arts. I am still kind of developing a business plan, but here is where I am going with it currently: kids arts classes, crafts for young and old, fine art and mixed media, event planning and children's room decorating and organizing.
2. I have been teaching a dance class for preschoolers called "Lil' Crocodiles. It is being held at this awesome older building in town and I am able to trade cleaning it for class use. I am starting out with one weekly 45 minute class for kids ages 2-6. It has been lots of fun!
3. Bartering has been something both J and I have been really getting into. We have been going through the house, ridding rooms of clutter and unused items and gaining some nice, needed things. J and I have also traded some labor for delicious meals.
4. My newest bartering agreement...providing childcare last minute to a single dad who is a personal trainer. He is going to be training me for two months for me helping him this month caring for his two sweet kids.
5. We are waiting to hear some big news that may effect our family so be praying. Will write about it soon.
6. E has been going to therapy here at a local place. She has been wonderful and we had a bit of a breakthrough with him!! It was emotional and awesome to see him express some sort of feeling toward his background and birthmom (we have no clue who she is) and turn to ME for comfort.

Apple farm

We had a fun Saturday at a local organic farm. We picked apples and a few pumpkins, enjoying the sunny day (they are getting fewer and further between).

it's a zoo

We had several appointments at the children's hospital for our foster daughter, back to back and over an hour drive one way. So we made it a fun trip and rented a hotel room (actually two), went out to eat and swam in the pool. The next day we went to the zoo and wore everyone out!

Almost a man...

Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid, one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory.
Douglas MacArthur

Goodbye

We have had dogs as pets for as long as I can remember. I grew up with several great dogs, and had a few in our marriage before kids. Robin the beagle joined our family about 10 years ago, and we added Jackson, the long haired chihuahua about seven years ago. On the 4th of July, we left both dogs in the chain link dog run outside. Unfortunately, Jackson must have dug out from underneath and escaped. After searching, putting up posters, calling and visiting the local humane societies, we still have not found poor Jackson. Then tragedy hit our family as J. was getting the kids ready to go the other morning. I was at a therapy session with E. and missed the whole thing. I met J. in the parking lot of work to trade cars. I asked how the morning went, and learned about what happened. Robin had ran out the front door left open by a child, and ran right into the road. He was hit and killed by a truck going past. J. was inside, getting our foster child ready to go. He heard yelling, tires squealing, and a loud thud, followed by yells for dad. He went running out, fearing that one of our children had been hit, but it was Robin. He sent everyone inside, all crying and upset, and dealt with the disposal and clean up. And then we all mourned. J. was able to come home early from work that night. We are still sad. We miss our dogs.

Look at the tractor!!!!

S. wanted everyone to look at the tractor when at the Rodeo Days Parade last weekend. J. took four kids over to the eastern side of the state to visit family. I was sad I wasn't able to go, our van is having too many problems and we couldn't all fit in the car. But it was a good thing I was home so we could take in a new foster child.

First warm-ish day of 2011

On a sunny Sunday when J was off work, we headed to a nearby park with these two turkeys,

no, these ones...

pet and fed some animals,

"drove" a tractor,

climbed trees,

and discovered wetland life.

updates

Dust has settled a bit from our difficult week, but things are still tense.

L. is at a counseling session right now with his dad. I was planning on going but was not able to due to childcare issues/preschoolers getting on and off buses. I wonder if he might be able to open up more with me not there anyway. He did NOT want to go. It's a pastor from our church who is a school counselor and youth leader, so I am sure L. is embarrassed and worried about what might happen.

We had a fun day yesterday with friends at the bay. We packed hot dogs, salads and smore stuff and built a fire near the water. The kids had a great time playing and the weather was mild and perfect in my opinion.

We haven't had any more foster care placements, which I think is perfect for now. We had a lot going on and I can't imagine going through that while caring for another child. I am still learning the ins and outs of how things work. I haven't received an invoice for payment yet, and I think today is the last day to turn it in. I hope I can get things figured out soon.

We are needing to plan our summer. There are a lot of possibilities for activities for the kids. But I need to come to some decisions about what to do!

Public school is in the works for ALL my kids in the fall. I am a little sad, but I think it is the best thing at this point. L. will be a high schooler, C. a jr. higher, K. a 2nd or 3rd grader (not sure yet on placement), E. a kindergartener, S. a preschooler. Wow. If there is an event in our school district, you can bet we will be there!

How quickly

How quickly time has passed...

from the moment I first held my first born son in my arms in the recovery room after an emergency c-section delivery, to hugging a 14 year old son now taller than me!

We've quickly gone from a Batman fanatic to a moody, teenage young man.

And after a quiet dinner of mac n cheese eating outside with his siblings on a sunny day, he had gone without any indication, no one really even noticed he left until late in the evening, we all thought he was hanging out in his room.

How quickly my mind jumped to the worst possible thoughts of things that could have happened to my baby boy.

How quickly our community banded together to help. Pictures were posted on facebook, police officers and sheriff deputies were searching, friends came to sit with me and take little kids for a bit. Many offered to pray and give emotional support.

How quickly, yet how SLOWLY 17 hours passed while he was missing. A note was found that he had run away, and my worst fears where being shared with my level headed husband. How quickly I broke down when he unplugged our computer to take into the police station to have it analyzed.

How quickly I was RELIEVED yet so ANGRY when my son was found by a friend and brought home. Praise God he was unharmed, and came back safe to us. Things might never be completely the same again for our family. We are working on some things, but I must say, his reasons for leaving seemed so small in our adult minds, sister issues and things like that. He had spent the entire night outside, alone.

Please pray for us and him.

What's been going on?

It's been awhile since my last post. My computer crashed. Yes, our two year old imac decided to stop working. We tried all the tricks and needed to take it in to the shop. They discovered the cooling fan stopped working, therefore frying our hard drive. We stupidly had not backed all our files up in a long time. Since we have dial up it's next to impossible to upload to a remote system. So we lost pictures, files, adoption paperwork, tax info, etc. etc. After $250 we were able to get a new fan and hard drive installed. But they were not able to recover our data. I am still sad. I am thankful that I have this blog, we have pictures on here at least!

Make a Wish came out to our house last week. The two volunteers visited and talked with S. and our family. They asked all sorts of questions to get to know him like what his favorite movie is, favorite foods, favorite color, etc. They brought him some gifts too, animal cookies, a John Deere t-shirt and hat, and two new tractor toys. Tractors are S's favorite. He was so excited. For his big wish: a playground. The next step is to wait for doctor approval, to be sure he does not have any medical restrictions. Waiting for the doctor seems like it's taking forever! In the meantime, we were able to pick out a playground from Rainbow Play Systems, and once we get the go ahead from Dr, then the planning begins.

Cookies, pink (as S's request)

S. and his new J.D. stuff

Volunteers for MAW

I finished the CPR/First Aid/BBP training for DSHS. The two oldest kids came too. It was great to get this out of the way, but I found it very informative too. The protocol for CPR has changed, and it's been years since I was trained. I mailed in the last of our paperwork, proof of our pets' vaccinations and J. and my training certificates yesterday. We should be close to a home visit. We also purchased and set up a new crib and fireplace barrier this week. We are nearly ready!

C. got a big part in the musical Annie Jr. at school! She is playing Ms.Hannigan. She is excited, it was her second choice (guess what the first one was?). She practices every friday after school and the play is in June. I can't wait to see her perform.

Adoption does not make me look glamorous

I have written a post about adoption and how it seems some couples adopt to gain a "brown baby accessory". Today, I write to explain how my life has changed since going from three kids to five; and becoming an inter-racial family with special needs kids. It has not transformed me into the glamorous A. Jolie. But... I would say I am a better woman because of it.

BEFORE: I used to buy gymboree, carters, gap and old navy. New, in the box, never opened.

TODAY: I buy resale, thrift store and garage sale clothing. The kids sport hand me downs. I don't think they look much different though, since I have scored some great finds and brand names on the bargain shopping trips. And we have been blessed with some great hand me downs too!

BEFORE: We would go out together as a family and people would smile and comment about our beautiful family, or our well behaved children.

TODAY: We go out and people say "Are all these kids yours? You sure have your hands full!"

Or they just stare.

BEFORE: We would enjoy going on fun outings like the movie theater or the science museum.

TODAY: We stay around home a lot more or split up the family. It's just a lot of chaos and work to chase around the young ones and some of us have very short attention spans.

BEFORE: I would go get my hair cut and colored at a professional salon every six weeks or so.

TODAY: It's been over a year since I colored my hair and six months since my last hair cut (which is a long time for someone with a short style!) I also cut J's hair and the kids. I recently botched C's haircut and she was treated to a salon cut, so much better!

BEFORE: We would all go to church and everyone was well behaved and quiet.

TODAY: I miss most of worship having to sit in the hallway with a loud, wiggly, or disobedient child.

BEFORE: I did not like confrontation.

TODAY: I have learned to speak up for myself and my children. Their rights are important to me, no matter what.

BEFORE: The house was somewhat peaceful and calm, most of the time.

TODAY: There is never a dull moment and it's only quiet on a rare occasion.

BEFORE: The kids had more room in the mini-van.

TODAY: The van is full, and if a family trip to Costco, Walmart or hardware store is planned, we have to consider every purchase, just to be sure it can make it home!

BEFORE: I would let little things annoy me.

TODAY: I let the little things go. I try to think "Is this really worth the effort to make a deal over this?" Sometimes they still annoy me. I pray more. I bite my tongue. I count to ten A LOT.

BEFORE: I had a social life.

TODAY: We rarely get invited to dinner. Our first dinner invitation in many months resulted in:

one broken window curtain rod, a spilled root beer, and a p*op accident on the bedroom carpet. We will see if we get invited over again!

BEFORE: I knew nothing of how the special education system worked. I didn't know how to care for many special needs.

TODAY: I know a lot, and am learning more everyday.

BEFORE: We could go grocery shopping and spend $100 on four days of groceries.

TODAY: We go grocery shopping and spend just under $200 on four days of groceries.

BEFORE: It bothered me to have people stare or make comments, especially regarding my sons' ethnicity.

TODAY: I find humor in little things. During our dinner out, S. was referred to by our friend's son as "that black kid who p*oped in my bedroom".

I found it endearing!

BEFORE: Our house was clean, with no stains on the carpet or couch, and it smelled nice. I had time to cook and bake. We had time to play more, read more, and work on projects.

TODAY: Our house is not clean, there are stains on the carpet and couch, and it smells a bit off. (with a scented candle burning to mask the odor!) I don't bake, and the meals I cook are simpler. I don't find as much time to play, read and work on projects, although I have a lot of desire and ambition to do so.

BEFORE: I had a self centered, "it's all about me" lifestyle and mindset.

TODAY: I rarely have time to even think about myself. I live for others, God and my family. And I am happier because of it.

My baby

My youngest daughter is turning eight. I can't believe how fast time flies.

K. is a wonderful little lady.

She is kind, compassionate, and loveable.

She makes friends easily and is very social.

She is a Daddy's girl and can't fall asleep without saying bedtime prayers with him.

She loves art, animals, playing outside or with friends.

She is petite and lovely,

brave and adventurous.

I am a little sad to see her grow.

But I love to see how she has grown.

Happy Birthday K!

Great Wolf Lodge, Grand Mound

We were treated to a two night vacation to Great Wolf Lodge for a Christmas gift. The kids have been looking forward to it since Christmas morning.

We started off the day by leaving early on Saturday, dropping the dog at the kennel, the other one with Grandma and Grandpa, and driving for three hours to get there. We stood in the lobby line for quite a while, Saturday was a busy time yet it appeared there was only one person working! Thankfully another employee was passing out bracelets so the kids and I could change and go to the water park while J. finished checking in. Aunt N. was able to come an join us for the day, and she was able to go on the fun slides with the older kids while someone stayed with the little boys.

The waterpark was lots of fun. There was something for everyone, big slides, medium slides, hot tub, wave pool, water basketball, and little kid area with small slides. S. didn't really enjoy getting splashed and there was not a quiet area for him to just sit in the water. The little kid area had all sorts of water squirting, splashing, dumping and spraying. I wish they would have a pool just for kids who don't like to get really wet! E. had a great time and by the end of the weekend was putting his face underwater every chance he got!

We went to our room after a few hours, had a snack, got bathed and changed.

We went out to eat at Country Cousins to celebrate S.'s birthday and met with family there. S. opened some gifts, ate some mini corn dogs, got some ice cream and tried to blow out the candle. He really loved having all that attention.

After the kids went to bed J. and I left the teens in charge while we snuck out to the bar and had a snack and a drink to unwind. It was a busy day and was nice to just talk.

The next day we ate breakfast at the Loose Moose in the resort. It was Sunday morning and CRAZY busy. The service was ok, and the food was fresh. The kids filled up on sweets and junk, but we encouraged a few healthy choices too. I had some eggs, bacon, potatoes and waffles with strawberries. It was pretty good.

We spent most of the day in the water park. K was able to go on all the slides (expect the Tornado) with an adult. L and C had quite a time going on all the slides, riding the waves and enjoying every bit of the park. They even supervised the little boys so J and I could ride down the slides with K a few times.

We took a break at the arcade, and in our room for lunch (there was a fridge and microwave in the room so we packed our meals). We got the boys to take a nap, so we laid low for a few hours in the afternoon.

We went back to the waterpark until 8 pm. It was so much quieter by the afternoon and we were able to enjoy the slides with no lines. I went on all the big slides with the kids, a few were pretty scary. At night the lighted slides are lots of fun. The Howlin' Tornado was completely dark and had a huge drop. Next time J. tells me "it's pretty tame" I am not going to believe him!

J. took the little boys to story time while we finished up with some time in the hot tub. We went back to the room for some pj time, popcorn, tv and treats. The kids ran around with their wand at the interactive stations around the hotel for a bit too.

Monday morning we got up earlier and had breakfast again. This time there was nobody there! It was quite a change. The downfall was the food had been sitting out for quite a while and it was not as good. We went up to our room, packed up everything, brought it out to the car, checked out and then hit the water park again for a few more hours. It was snowing and we wanted to get home before dark, so we had to leave earlier than planned.

We all had a really good time and think it was one of the best family trips we've been on. I think we will go again, in a few years.

Tis the season

Today we are cooking up a turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and the rest of the fixings for a big Christmas dinner. We are celebrating together early so J. can be home to enjoy the good food and time with us while he is on his days off. He works many holidays so we are certainly used to that. He has been employed in this line of work for over 11 years. Usually we go visit family to stay busy if he is working. But this year, my parents are in HAWAII. I am so jealous. My sister is having her in-laws visit. My in-laws are all over 5 hours away, most over the mountain passes. So we are alone this year. We will be opening our gifts early on Christmas morning, before J. leaves for work at 9 am. Then I will be trying to find some fun activities to do with the kids. I hope their new gifts will keep them entertained for a while. I told them what I want for Christmas this year is for everyone to get along!

PS. Please think about the people who work in the service/emergency field this Christmas. They work hard in the cold nasty weather and most times are not much appreciated.

Christmas gift giving

K. and E. looking in the Santa bag

This year we are following the growing trend in our family; less is more. Last year we did pretty well, I think I stuck with giving each child three smallish gifts. This year, my goal is to keep it to one gift each from J. and I. Yesterday we had the kids draw names between each other. They will each pick out and help buy a gift for one sibling. Then as a family we will be buying gifts for extended family and close friends. I will try to do some homemade crafts or baking for teachers, mail carriers and the like.

On Christmas morning we don't have stockings, we have a Santa bag. Santa fills the red sack with individually wrapped small gifts labeled for each person. But Santa does not take center stage here.

We are going to be focusing on the ONLY reason for Christmas. What we aren't spending on toys and stuff, we will be giving to others. We will be spending quality time with each other, making memories. Loving Christ. Worshiping the King.

Check out this site: http://www.adventconspiracy.org/

I am still trying to figure out plans for celebrating Christmas eve and day. Unfortunately J. is working both. He works over 10 hour shifts. We will not be seeing him much these days. We have celebrated Christmas many times without him, but we always had family to visit and keep us busy. This year, family is not available. One side is across the state, the other have vacations and in-laws to celebrate with. So we are contemplating changing the date of Christmas to one that J. will be off work.

my love

Sure, I did hint at it, well, I specifically said what I would love and how to do it. When I got home yesterday afternoon after flying for nearly 18 hours, I was greeted by J. and the three youngest kiddos at the airport. After getting in the car, I was surprised with a bucket full of goodies. Halloween candy, chocolates, apples, homemade cards, and a jewelry box. I knew what was in it, but was so happy that he listened. He took my engagement/wedding ring into the jewelers to get resized. We got married at age 19. Needless to say, my ring finger is several sizes chubbier than it was 15 years ago. I have been wearing a different ring (one we got on vacation in Hawaii five years ago) for a long time and I have kept putting off the desire to get this done. But J. listened, and he took it in to get resized, cleaned and polished before I got home.

ramblings

I know on my last post I said I would see you when I am home. I am not home yet, but just couldn't stay away! Blogging really helps clear the head and kill some time.

The other day I met up with some friends I met online. Another adopting mom and a mom who lives here with her family. They are both wonderful ladies. We hung out for most of the day. They offered support and love, and I offered...well I don't think I really brought much to the table. Beth was planning a Halloween party at her house, and was driving back to the city that night. She offered a place for me to stay for a the rest of my trip if I wanted. It sounded really great to have a change of scenery, hang out with some great new friends, and get a ride closer to the airport so I wouldn't have to travel so far alone on Tuesday. So, I took her up on that offer, went back to HSH, packed my bags, said goodbyes, and left. M. did not seem sad or upset at all. She was really excited about the things I was leaving behind. New to her clothes, books, little toys, etc. She forced a hug and a kiss, which was better than the last time I left!

Last night was the Halloween party. A group of adoptive families who are here in country attended. It was the second time I had seen them. And for some reason it was so hard to be around them. Most of them were young. The children they are adopting are young. And I felt so dang jealous. They have been here for a small amount of time, with court way behind them, and some are ready to go home very soon with their precious kids. They didn't really have a lot to say to me, and I ackwardly escaped to my room a few times throughout the night. I did have a good time visiting with several women who are missionaries here, and learning more about the way things work. We ate homemade chili, coleslaw, cake and lots of candy! The kids went from door to door inside the house trick or treating. They dressed up as characters from Lost. So cute!

Last night I was tired and fell asleep early. Then I had some dreams. Weird dreams that seemed to last the whole night. I woke up around 4 am thinking. I thought about homesteading; raising animals and gardening. I thought about Christmas gifts and how I should shop for some while I am here. I thought about what foods I want to eat when I get home. I thought about my family and how excited I will be when I see a few of them at the airport. I have one full night left before I board that plane. I can't WAIT.

fo sho yo!

Well after speaking to dear lawyer last night I learned that yes, we indeed must have our case heard in the smaller local town. Yes, we must wait for the judge to take bench at the beginning of November. No, dear lawyer has no idea how long it will take to get a court date. Yes, he is aware of the timing issue and we more than likely will have to wait until the new year for a court hearing.

YES, as of last night, I am for sure leaving soon. In just four and a half days to be exact. I need to come home. My little boy is sick, J. is tired and so is grandma (she hasn't complained but I am sure), my kids need a mom, and I miss my family and friends terribly. I am so anxious to get home, regroup, and spend some good ole' quality time with my people. It's been great being here, but I MISS HOME. I have missed nearly all of my second favorite season, autumn. I am missing trick or treating, carving pumpkins, yummy food, and harvest activities with my kids. But I am sooo looking forward to Thanksgiving at my parent's house with my mom's excellent turkey dinner.

See ya when I am home and settled in, yo!

Taking care of things at home

When I am a gazillion miles away.

My husband came home with a lot to do, and I am so glad that he had a few days off to deal with things before starting work again. In the last week he has:

• Mowed the lawn
• Cleaned the roof and gutters
• Fixed the fireplace door
• Scheduled and went to two parent teacher conferences
• Dealt with insurance companies and bills for a prosthetic leg for big K. (praise God all the fees are covered!)
• Gotten sick with a cold.
• Cooked and ran errands

THANK YOU for being such a wonderful husband and father J.

I so thankful to my mother in law who has been staying at our house since AUGUST. She is one trooper of a grandma. I am also thankful for my parents for taking kids for overnight visits, for friends who have taken kids to do fun activities, brought over a meal or two, fixed our oven, refrigerator and gave a discount on the repairs for the fireplace door. I am so grateful for your prayers.

Since I really have no idea of when I will return home, I decided to spend a little bit of my time here planning and making lists. I am a list maker! I need some ideas and imput from you.

1. Ideas for easy, healthy meals. I don't really need recipes, just ideas. Throw them out at me, I don't mind. Even if it's just "spaghetti and garlic bread", it may be something I hadn't thought about.

2. Ideas for Christmas gifts for my children and family members. We are on a budget ($25-50 a person) and I won't have much time at all to shop. I most likely won't be able to make gifts either.

3. Ideas for chore assignments for 5-6 kids ranging in ages 13 to 2.